Just passing along some funny stuff to my readers today. Hope everyone enjoys these:
- A rooster & a cat are walking over a bridge. The cat slips & falls in river. The rooster can’t stop laughing! What is the moral of the story? ------Wherever there’s a wet pussy, there’s a happy cock!
- *NEWSFLASH* Snow White has been chucked out of Disney Land. She was reported to have pulled up her skirt, sat on Pinocchio's face and shouted "LIE BASTARD LIE!"
- CUSTOMER NOTIFICATION!!!! As of August 1, 2008, Viagra will only be available by its chemical name, which was so appropriately named by the chemists who invented it. So please ask for “MYCOXAFLOPPIN” at your favorite pharmacy.
- Behind every SUCCESSFUL woman, there is a SATISFIED man, but behind every SATISFIED woman there is an EXHAUSTED man...
- When a man talks dirty to a woman, it's sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 per minute.
- CHINESE BUFFET MENU: **CHU SUM TWAT **SUCK MI PORK **LICK MI CLIT **TUNGSUM CHICK **GOO IN HAND **GULP SUM KUM **CHO KON IT*****ENJOY YOUR MEAL!*****
The posts I make to my blog are never intended to offend anyone. Most of the stuff I post is just for laughs. Sometimes, reality can generate many laughs. I live in the south(USA) and I am a small town southern girl. And yes, I have a southern accent. And I am damn proud of it! Some find it cute, some find it annoying, and well, some just don't know what to think! Every city has a ghetto. People from many walks of life may live or may have grown up in a "ghetto" more than likely not by choice. The following is a ghetto spelling bee. These are terms you may hear in the ghetto. Or heck, you may even here them on Jeff Foxworthy. If you do not comprehend the meaning of any of the word, please leave me a comment and I will translate for you. Although I did not grow up in the ghetto, southern slang is just a part of life in the south, and some of this may be considered as such. Hope you enjoy and don't forget to laugh!
assignment. He must use each vocabulary word in a sentence.
1. Hotel- I gave my girlfriend crabs, and the ho tell everybody.
2. Dictate-My girlfriend say my dictate good.
3. Catacomb - I saw Don King at da fight the other night. Man, somebody get that catacomb.
4. Foreclose -If I pay alimony today, I got no money foreclose.
5. Rectum -I had two Cadillac's, but my bitch rectum both.
6. Disappointment - My parole officer tol' me if I miss disappointment they gonna send me back to the joint.
7. Penis - I went to the doctors and he handed me a cup and said penis.
8. Israel -Tito try to sell me a Rolex. I say, "man, it look fake." He say, "Bullshit,
that watch israel".
9 . Undermine -There's a fine lookin' ho living in the apartment undermine.
10. Acoustic -When I was little, my uncle bought me acoustic, and took me to the poolhall.
11. Iraq - When we got to the poolhall, I tol' my uncle; iraq, you break.
12. Stain -My mother-in-law stopped by and I axed her, ! "Do you plan on stain for dinner?"
13. Fortify - I axed this ho on da street, "how much?" she say "fortify."
14. Income -I just got in bed wif da ho and income my wife
Furthering your education with today's "Ebonic" word:
Today's word is: "OMELETTE"
Let us use it in a sentence:
"I should pop yo ass fo what you jus did, but omelette dis one slide."
Labels: animal comedy, ebonic slang, ebonics, funny blogs, jokes